-By Salsa Dancing Addict

 

I see this happen often during the free salsa lesson before the actual dance starts at salsa clubs, but it occurs on the dance floor just as well.    

What am I talking about? I’m talking about the salseros who feel that they need to teach every salsera they dance with how to dance salsa. By the time the women gets to me in the rotation, they are usually wide eyed and shocked at how some people take salsa so seriously.  These women often get “yelled” at by that salsero and it takes away from all the fun.

At the same time the same thing can happen to a salsero. The woman may tell the guy how to lead when she herself isn’t a good dancer!   It’s the woman’s job to follow the lead no matter how good or bad the lead is.   If the guy doesn’t lead you to go somewhere, then don’t go there. It’s not going to help the guy if you anticipate things and do things automatically.  (嗯嗯，女孩不能太主动！)If you follow the lead, then the only reason you didn’t go where he wanted you to go is because he didn’t give you a good lead. It’s his job to figure it out and it’s your excuse to say “that’s where I felt you were leading me.”

Here’s a good rule of thumb.

Unless you are the dance instructor giving the lesson, or unless the other person asks you how to dance, don’t offer any advice. Just let them dance! Most people dance for health and to have fun and they are not aspiring to become a professional dancer.

If you need to tell the other person how to dance. It is better etiquette to ask if they want your advice.  Example: “Would you like me to give you a tip about ______?” (Fill in the blanks)  Your feedback will be better received if the person receiving your advice actually wants it.

There are exceptions to this. If you know something is dangerous where the other person can get hurt by doing the wrong move, by all means tell them.

 

Getting stepped on (相信在拥挤的舞池里大家都有碰到！)

 

Most likely this will happen to you more than you would hope. It usually happens in a crowded area or if you are surrounded by beginner dancers. Here's some good dance etiquette.

The best medicine to this is prevention.

Guys, protect your dance partner by paying attention to your surroundings. The women can’t see behind them and they put all their trust in you. If you see someone is about to back into her, firmly but gently pull her out of the way.

Women, you have their own responsibility too. If you don’t give the guy enough connection, then he won’t be able to lead you properly or save you from being stepped on.

One huge mistake I’ve seen is taking huge steps and letting your arm extend all the way straight. If you are getting slammed into people and stepping on people, it may be your fault. For beginners, this is usually the culprit. One way to avoid this is to take uncomfortably small steps… Your heel should not go past your other foot’s toe.

 

Never turn down a dance. （永不拒绝？！）

 

If you’ve come to a salsa club to dance, it is proper dance etiquette that you should never turn down a dance. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know much salsa. If you’ve danced with at least one person that night, you shouldn’t turn anyone else down.

When you dance with someone, you may be surprised. It may be the best dance of your life. If it’s horrible, then it’s only a few minutes that you’ve wasted and never can get back. But the best part is, you don’t have to dance with them ever again if you don’t want to.

 

 

Ways to avoid a dance. （嗯嗯，该拒绝时就拒绝！）

 

This is a fun topic. We all do it from time to time. It’s more of an art than a science. It’s not necessarily mean, but just gives you an appearance that you aren’t quite ready to dance yet. I'd say that this is in the grey area of dance etiquette.

Here are some ways to avoid getting asked to dance at a bad time.

When you see someone coming to ask you to dance that you don’t want to dance with at the time, do not look them in the eyes when they are coming towards you. Once you lock eyes, it’s the kiss of death. You have just increased your chances of being asked to dance by 90%.

If you see someone coming towards you, get engaged in conversation with one of your friends. This has about a 60% chance of working if the person knows you and a 90%-95% chance of working if the person that wants to ask you to dance doesn’t know you. If they ask you to dance, don’t refuse.

Here’s another way to get out of a dance. You can turn and run with your tail between your legs and go to the bathroom when you see them coming. It’s a cowardly way of getting out of a dance, but if you must, you must. （应该不至于躲得那么狼狈吧？）

Some legitimate excuses...

 

There are some legitimate excuses for turning down a dance: （嗯嗯，借口是不能少嘀！）

 

·  You need to go to the bathroom.

·  You need to rest and get a drink.

·  You’re feet are hurting and need a rest.

·  You really don’t know how to dance.

·  You are about to go home.

·  You are taking off your shoes and are about to go home.

·  You already have one shoe off and are about to go home.

·  You’re not really there to dance.

 

·  Some rude things to avoid:

·  Don’t go dance with another person just after you’ve turned someone down. That’s just plain in-your-face rude dance etiquette (or rather lack thereof).

·  Don’t just dance all night with the person you show up with. Salsa is a social dance, and its customary to dance with everyone.

·  Don’t keep stepping on someone. If you keep on stepping on someone, there’s something wrong. Try moving away from that person and taking smaller steps. Also pay more attention to your surroundings. Its bad enough that you stepped on that person once, but if you keep on stepping on them, it may make them a little angry.